the squiggle

I smoked a kipper today .....and later i will be smoking lots of Green stuff for a laugh. My old man likes to smoke his pipe when he returns from the pub slightly sozzled.

Cheeky wee taster for you and guess what Colin's dug is called eerrrrrrmmmm...."DUG" McRae

If you are having a meet, i may make an appearance if it is early in the month The Aberdeen area meet is the only one i have not attended and being on holiday for a while, may as well make the effort I may even bring some pics of Colin McRae's sheep along to keep things interesting

how do you know you can pee 30ft verticaly matey spose youre a bit taller than me so youve got a head start right away, and what if your pee has been surgicaly enhanced ie snip would that help at all and does your peepee have to be angry to achieve such a distance. 30ft im away to try that pissin your pants isne my scene though [:$] Just dont try it when the wind is blowing, learn from the mistakes TheSquirrel555 makes. Best results come from holding it in till it hurts badly then skin back and clench your anus. Release pressure is nigh on 60-70psi, so make sure the dog is out the way or a trip to the vets could be on the cards All high pressure urination quieries handled between the hours of 2200 and 2330, outwith these times contact your local councillor

......and there was me thinking of getting a 5k bank loan to fund a gearbox and turbo upgrade. There was time when 300 was the magical mark but now this has risen to the 400 area as the point to aim for. If it was not for the pushing the envelope we will all still be running around in std cars and people like yourself, Gumball and Peter that help us understand what the operational tolerances are for the New Age car and more importantly how well a certain turbo responds on a STI and what results are expected from certain applications on certain engines. From a third party point of view, i am interested in how the New Age STI Type UK cars being built and developed by different tuners using different turbos, different management systems and more importantly different mappers. Craig, from a personal stand point, i like your style and your attitude towards your gaining power from your desired mode of transportation. It is the pushing the envelope that makes Scottishscoobies a really interesting place to be at the moment with so many high powered cars kicking about all over the region Ally, so how much BHP does your car have then? Wilky, you are in a league of your own, the league of extraordinary gentlemen Me, i just love how ugly my car is but i really need to get out more often. To summerise................I find if you pee without removing your trousers and undercrackers then you are gonna show everyone who the daddy is, judging by the size of the stain down the right leg and if you pull the foreskin back as far as possible i can pee a good 30ft vertically Personally not interested in beating anyone, Wilky moved them goalposts well out of reach, all i want is a reliable 300bhp and thats what i have.

.....and it had a scoop on the bonnet no way.... i dynoed this weekend and was told i had 112bhp transmission loss [] ouch Thats what you get when you put tractor oil in the gearbox mate...........[]

.....not if it was mapped with this unmetered air present. The problem would show itself after the problem was fixed.

.....and it had a scoop on the bonnet

Pulled the power that it was promised she would pull. This time she hit 1.6bar and produced a result that would bring a smile to a Chinamans face.

My favourite clip of all time Watch the way Colin drifts the Focus round Luffield http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vgzAsAiWlW8

Been a member for the last 45 years now. ...........................NOT Officially a freeloading lurker with dubious intentions to undermine the fabric of our society

Do you rob banks for a living? That is one hell of an amatuer car collection, something for everyone

Have you not seen the size of Gumball's belly......... Everyone has gone on about BHP but it is torque that makes you accelarate. A car with 1000bhp and 1lbs/ft of torque is going to be slower up the strip than one with 1bhp and 1000lbs/ft of torque Other factors will include weight of vehicle, tyre grip and compound, aerodynamics and gearing

Get the AA to flat bed it to the garage NOT tow it

I take from your user name you have a 95 car Cam adn Crank sensor are known to fail on the early car and would give a syptom as you describe Put the PowerFC settings back to the one that Andy put on it and look elsewhere for the fault. What spec is your car? If not to far from std then put a std ecu in there and see what fault codes it throws up

I think the rear one on a New Age car is the narrowband sensor. Unknown as to price but it will be cheaper than the other sensor in the up pipe which is a wideband unit. No chance of redoing the thread on the sensor or tack welding it into place as a last resort or.......the rear one might be the wideband and the front one is the narrowband. Sorry could not be much more use but best advice would be make sure he is sitting down when the dealer quotes the price

Is that what the nun said to the bishop? That is one massive engine with one massive fuel consumption record.

Aye nice price and then some. If i had a spare £3400 then i would place a bid but alas i do not

I pay 950 a year through Kieth Micheals with mods declared but i do stay in the Scottish equivilent of Bierut. Highest quote i got was 1800 from the AA

Without to much one finger typing RA is the homologation version of the Impreza, the bits used on a STI RA were allowed in Grp N rallying. Things like DCCD, roof vent and fifth injector on some models gave the WRX an excellent starting point for all classes of rallying RA stands for Rally Altered STI RA comes with all the toys as std, DCCD, plated rear diff, some had quick rack steering, lightened body panels, roof vent but few creature comforts as they add weight that was not needed in competition The one you have spotted sounds like a late V Limited with its World Rally Blue colour scheme, if it is a V Limited then it will have a number plaque in front of the gear stick I would go for the best when buying an Impreza and a late classic STI RA is up there with the best

.....and i am right behind Storm in the queue. As for next year, i have 3 runs of the same quality in store as 1 day run outs. Planning a run in March, May and October. Without giving to much details away the March run will be centrally located, the same kind of area as the November run last year. This route will be hard mapped with all junctions physically marked with marker tape. The May run will be a bit more south-west of the November run and the October run will cover the exact same roads we covered a couple of weeks back.. I am planning the runs and putting a sh1tload of effort and my own money into recceing the runs to make sure the road quality is worthy of the Impreza but my aim next year will be to locate them geographically central in Scotland to ensure EVERYONE can attend, from the Rievers in the south to the Sheep of the north. Lets get together, burn some fuel and get to know what each other look like with out a keyboard in sight I would love to push the idea of an overnighter on Bute, the thought of a stramash of Scoobies invading the island would be awesome with a capital Z. I fancy the idea of an Ingilston style sprint challange against the MLR chaps. Gain weight at an extraordinary pace and possibly give up the Tobagan JPS ......i said POSSIBLY give up the Tobagon JPS

Easily bought............yummy!!!!!!!

....and for your excellent run a couple of weeks ago with the septic tanks, i will make the bandit mobile twice as fast.

For calling me the fluffy one, the Blue thunder footage will be slowed down to approx Bandit speed. Need to clear out the old movies as the poor wee program is getting stressed and keeps on throwing in the towel I will spend some time on Saturday transferring footage onto the main PC

Errrrrrrrr news just in........... Nae chance, get the heavy metal specials back on it