mick_weatherill

Ah s0d it [] Forget i tried to post this up .

Have ya scrolled down enough its come out on mine !!!

Summer 2006 is almost finished. To celebrate this many supermarket stores are giving away free barbecues to all that can go and collect them. You can get a free BBQ from any of the following stores. · ASDA · Morrison's · Costco · Kwik Save · Somerfield · Aldi · Sainsbury · Tesco · <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />Iceland · Netto All BBQs come with a higher shelf which can be used for keeping things warm! PLEASE NOTE: Some stores may charge a £1 administration fee. If you wish to see a picture of this product please scroll down.

MAN in Crisis > > I was married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said > "Honey, 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on the > sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep > every night with a hot 25 year old blonde." > > "Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed and plasma screen tv > but I'm sleeping with a 50 year old woman. It seems to me that you are > not holding up your side of things." > > My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find > a hot 25 year old blonde and she would make sure that I would once again > be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, watching a 10 > inch black and white TV, and sleeping on a sofa bed. > > Aren't older women Great! They really know how to solve your mid-life > crises................ -- .

Good Clean Pilot fun After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripesheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond inwriting on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack asense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problemsas submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. (By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never lost a passengers life as a result of an accident.) (P = The problem logged by the pilot.)(S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.) P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement.S: Almost replaced left inside main tyre. P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. P: Something loose in cockpit.S: Something tightened in cockpit. P: Dead bugs on windshield.S: Live bugs on back-order. P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet perminute descent. S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.S: Evidence removed. P: DME volume unbelievably loud.S: DME volume set to more believable level. P: Friction lock causes throttle levers to stick.S: That's what they're there for. P: IFF inoperative.S: IFF always inoperative in "OFF" mode. P: Suspected crack in windshield.S: Suspect you're right. P: Number 3 engine missing.S: Number 3 engine found on right wing after brief search. P: Aircraft handles funny.S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. P: Target radar hums.S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics. P: Mouse in cockpit.S: Cat installed. P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like amidget pounding on something with a hammer. S: Took hammer away from midget.

Those tow bars with the magnets on should be outlawed !!!![] At least mrs is ok . The cars only a lump of metal and can be replaced . The way round the auto prob is keep the scoob in first gear terri Ian wont mind []

What a horrible thought, someone stalking mickyw They could do a lot worse!!!!!!!![]

[:$]Thats me[:$] Ive gota stalker everyone []

[]

Not my fault youve had a sense of humour by pass []

This is a good un !! An elderly couple in a small town had been dating for a long time. At the urging of their friends, they decided it was finally time for marriage.Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation on how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on. Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship. " How do you feel about sex? " he asked hesitantly. " Well," she said, responding very carefully, " I'd have to say - I would like it infrequently." The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, then over his glasses, he looked her in the eye and asked, "Is that one word or two?". <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /> No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG Free Edition. Version: 7.1.405 / Virus Database: 268.12.4/449 - Release Date: 15/09/2006

.BORDERREG {margin:2px;cursor:hand;width:'26px';height:'26px';} .BORDERMO {border:1px solid buttonshadow;border-left:1px solid buttonhighlight;border-top:1px solid buttonhighlight; margin:1px;cursor:hand;} .BORDERCLCK {border:1px solid buttonshadow;border-right:1px solid buttonhighlight;border-bottom:1px solid buttonhighlight; margin:2px;margin-bottom:0px;margin-right:0px;cursor:hand;} function MouseOverEffect() { var item = event.srcElement; if(IsValidId(item.id)){ item.className = "BORDERMO"; } } function MouseOutEffect() { var item = event.srcElement; if(IsValidId(item.id)){ item.className = "BORDERREG"; } } function MouseOverClick() { var item = event.srcElement; if(IsValidId(item.id)){ item.className = "BORDERCLCK"; } } function IsValidId(elemId) { var isValid = false; if(elemId == "contentbutton" || elemId == "attachbutton"){ isValid = true; } return isValid; } AS A WOMAN PASSED HER DAUGHTER'S CLOSED BEDROOM DOOR, SHE HEARD A STRANGE BUZZING NOISE COMING FROM WITHIN. OPENING THE DOOR, SHE OBSERVED HER DAUGHTER GIVING HERSELF A REAL WORKOUT WITH A VIBRATOR. SHOCKED, SHE ASKED: "WHAT IN THE WORLD! ARE YOU DOING!?" THE DAUGHTER REPLIED: "MOM, I'M 32 YEARS OLD, UNMARRIED, AND THIS IS ABOUT AS CLOSE AS I'LL EVER GET TO A HUSBAND. SO PLEASE GO AWAY ,AND LEAVE ME ALONE!" THE NEXT DAY, THE GIRL'S FATHER HEARD THE SAME BUZZ COMING FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF THE CLOSED BEDROOM DOOR.UPON ENTERING THE ROOM, HE OBSERVED HIS DAUGHTER MAKING PASSIONATE LOVE TO HER VIBRATOR. TO HIS QUERY AS TO WHAT SHE WAS DOING, THE DAUGHTER SAID: "DAD I'M 32, UNMARRIED, AND THIS IS ABOUT AS CLOSE AS I'LL EVER GET TO A HUSBAND. SO PLEASE, GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE!" A COUPLE DAYS LATER, THE WIFE CAME HOME FROM A SHOPPING TRIP, PLACED THE GROCERIES ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER, AND HEARD THAT BUZZING NOISE COMING FROM, OF ALL PLACES, THE LIVING ROOM!!! SHE ENTERED, AND OBSERVED HER HUSBAND SITTING ON THE COUCH, SIPPING A COLD BEER, AND STARING AT THE TV. THE VIBRATOR WAS NEXT TO HIM ON THE COUCH, BUZZING LIKE CRAZY. THE WIFE ASKED: "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" THE HUSBAND REPLIED: "I'M WATCHING FOOTBALL WITH MY SON-IN-LAW."

I touch goats tony

Four men and a woman are stuck in an elevator... While they wait to be rescued from their predicament, they strike up a conversation... The first guy introduces himself to the others by saying, "I'm a YUPPIE., you know... Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist." The second guy says, "I'm a DINKY., you know... Double Income, No Kids Yet." The third guy says, "I'm an RUB, you know...Rich, Urban, Biker." The fourth guy says, I am a D1LDO., you know... Double Income, Little Dog Owner." They turn to the woman and ask her, "What are you?" She replies, "I'm a WIFE, you know... Wash, Iron, F..k, Etc.." No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG Free Edition. Version: 7.1.405 / Virus Database: 268.12.4/448 - Release Date: 14/09/2006

Vicky not that im going tonight but they usually meet at 7.30 .

Your really abnormal then lol[]

14. mickyw

14. mickyw

My car is a U.K warrantied car and i get it serviced at xtremes . And get my book stamped by them .I have been told that it dont affect my warranty at all .

Its confirmed i am abnormal i thought of a black hammer as well . OR is it you Thats abnormal thinking of a red one !!!!!![]

Cant make this one .[]Im up 2.30am for work sat morn and as you all know i need all the beauty sleep i can get!!![Y] I said that before Granby said it !![8-|] Morning Ian[]

THX hope no one see that[:$]

Spotted Dalthegooner looked like you were p...d off with the traffic jam []. car looked good thou.[Y]

So its Xtremes for you next time then!! Not only are Xtremes cheaper and in my view better . You can see what they are doing to your car !! i.e they dont take it round the back then bring it back later with a bill for work they may or may not of done . As i say with xtremes you see and get what you pay for .[Y]