mick_weatherill

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, " So you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days." Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely, this must be a sign from God!" The woman continues, "Look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." She hands the bottle of wine to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police.... " MORAL OF THE STORY: Women are clever, evil bitches.

Breaking News From Apple Apple Computers announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play music in women's breast implants. The iBreast will cost between $499 and $599. This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

ps...i won't mention the fish & chips Ian your right about the fish & chips they was the best ive ever had NOT[+o(] Other than that we had a good day .Thanks to organisers and the leader (markie ) he done such a good job i nominate him for all our outings []

Love the paint job Darren it looks the muts nuts [Y] P.s could do with a clean though[]

Cheers trev Ill give jeff a bell then follow him down [Y] P.s is it shorts whether[]????

Looks like me Christine and Joe can make it .. [Y] Is the meeting place still nottcutts 10.00am ??

HAVE A VOTE ON IT []

No but what me and er just did made a little tremour [] Or is that To much info []

Thanks Vicky .Ive just ordered some yellow stuff pads online £103 delivered Is that about right price ??? Anyone

Im in Herne Bay didnt feel a thing !!![Y]

Cheers Jay anyone else ??

Anyone know where i can get front brake pads for my o5 wrx ???

Have a great day and all the best [Y]

Markie im away for a couple of days but back sunday eve !!Looking forward to mon should be a good day [Y]

I got some fancy dust caps with the subaru logo on for my wheels about 6 months ago . I lived in Dartford on a main road as some of you know .Well i put these fancy caps on and every morning i used to notice one missing .[:@]So i got another set but still they kept going So i had a brain wave .Do them up so tight they couldnt get them off without some tools .That solved them going missing [].But Im off to Dorset in the morning and thought it would be a good idea to check the car i.e oil,water ,tyre pressures !!![8-)]Well even i cant get the bloody things off now [:'(] So its off to kwik fit for 4 new valves shortly [8-|]The moral is dont buy these dust caps in the first place but if you do let the thieving gits have them it will save you money in the long run [Y][][A]

A son asks his Dad, "What's the difference between theoretically and realistically?" Dad says "that's hard but I have an idea. Ask Mum if she'll sleep with the milkman for 1 million quid". Mum says "Yes". Dad says "now ask your sister if she'll sleep with the coal man for 2 million quid". Sister says "Yes". "Well there you go Son, that's your answer. Theoretically we're sitting on 3 million quid but realistically we're living with 2 slags".

nope ill go with the flow[]

Im up for it [Y]

A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it's only fair, since you are blind, that you should know five things: 1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat. 2. The bouncer is a blonde girl. 3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. Blonde with a black belt in karate. 4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight-lifter. 5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler. Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

I thought that as well but not having one repaired before i wasnt sure how reliable it would be . Do you know if i could match it ? its an 18 inch wheel ?

Ian I touch goats

this bad