O/T Made Me Laugh

[irish al]

NEWS REPORT SCOTLAND

 

THE METHILHILL EARTHQUAKE

 

19/07/2006 13.00HRS

 

A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter
scale hit Methilhill in the early hours of Monday. Victims were seen wandering
around aimlessly muttering "whit the fook"  "dinna ken"  and "ya hoor sir".The
earthquake decimated the area causing £30 worth of damage. Several priceless
collections and momentoes from the Balearics and Spanish Costa's were damaged
beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many
locals were woken well before treir Giro arrived. The East Fife Mail reported
that hundreds of residants were confussed and bewildered, still trying to come
to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in the
area.

 

One resident- Tracy Sharon Smith a fifteen years
old mother of 5 said it was such a shock, my little Chardonnay Mercedes came
running into my bedroom crying. MY younger two;Tyler Morgan and Megan Storm
slept through it all. I was still shaking when i was watching Kilroy next
morning.

 

Apparently though, looting, mugings and car crime
did carry on as normal.

 

The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship
4,000 crates of Sunny Delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue
workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities
of personal belongings, which include benifit books, jewellery from Argos and
Bone China from Poundstretchers.

 

HOW CAN YOU HELP

 

This apeal is to raise money for food and
clothing,parcels for those unfortunate to be caught up in this disaster.
Clothing is most sought after, the most needed include: Fila or Burberry
baseball caps, Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers) Shell suits (female) white
sports socks, Rockport boots and any other items usually sold at Poundstetchers.
Food parcels  may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same. Required
foodstuffs include microwave meals, tins of baked beans, ice cream andcans of
colt 45 Special Brew, 22p buys a biro for filling in compensation forms, £2.00
buys chips,and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9,£5 will pay for a packet of
fags and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.

 

Please do not send tents for shelter, as the sight
of posh housing is unfair on the population of the nieghbouring areas of
Methil.Buckhaven andKennoway

Al

[gus the bus]

FPMSL good one Al[] Hope theres naebody from on here lives in that vicinity[:$]

[G.T.]

al

I touch goats matey[Y]

[FastScooby]

very good, does Zeolite no stay near kennoway [][:$]

[irish al]

Thanks G.T. Ill post it today.

Al

[irish al]

very good, does Zeolite no stay near kennoway [][:$]

Not sure, but hes never here anyway so am sure he will be ok. Ha Ha Ha  [] [] [] [] []

[zeolite]

Here in Spirit if not in body.

This is the third version of that joke I have read. first Essex, second Birmingham and noo Fife eh.

Anyway I live in the classy village of Windygates. Coulster lives in Methil []

[wrxmania]

There is a Glasgow one I saw quite a long time ago - the Glasgow one really meets the mark & the image...