Guest Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 THE WEDDING TEST > > > >My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year when we decided to > get > married. My parents helped us in every way, and my friends encouraged > me. My > girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me. > That > one thing was her younger sister. > > > >My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of > >age, wore tight miniskirts, and low cut blouses. She would regularly > bend > down when near me, and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It > had > to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. > > > >One day little sister calls and asked me to come over to check the > wedding > invitations. She was alone when I arrived. > > > >She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had > feelings and > desires for me that she could not overcome and did not really want to > overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once > before I > got married and committed my life to her sister. > > > > > >I was in total shock and could not say a word. She said, "I'm going > upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come > up and > get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up > the > stairs. When she reached the top, she pulled down her panties and threw > them > down the stairs at me. > > > >I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front > door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house and walked > straight > toward my car. > > > >My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes > he > hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little > test. > We could not ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the > family!" > > > > > >The moral of this story is....................................... > >Always keep your condoms in your car.
wilky Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 (tumbleweed blows through a deserted town..............)
Guest Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 not to sound dim but what does "(tumbleweed blows through a deserted town..............) " mean??????????????????
wilky Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 Nice one Carl! Ciaran, only kidding it was funny but Ive heard it, hows the mini??
Gumball Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 as the sleeping mexican lies by the traffic lights, a bit of tumbleweed blows onto his hat"
Guest Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 ha ha carl very funny!!! wilky mini is fine as far as i know offshore at the moment. anyway the progress is swift gti seats welded in place. new engine mountings engine fully running but awating exhaust. just need to fit a new suspension bolt and then she is going 4 an mot!!
wilky Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 Cairan, Ill look out all the bits and bobs when I get back from the usa, 2 of the wheels are on a trailer the quad pulls on our farm, Ill get them off and get all four cleaned up and you can get a look at them, the rest you can have for nothing. Callum W
Guest Posted May 10, 2005 Posted May 10, 2005 that would be braw min u say 2 weeks well will have to be a while after that cos im back onshore imorn and then off 4 2 weeks then away again after that. oh new joke for the day by the way GLASGOW EARTHQUAKE APPEAL >An earthquake measuring 5.7 on the Richter scale hit Glasgow last >Wednesday morning. The epicentre was The Gorballs. Casualties were seen > wandering aimlessly saying 'bang out of order' 'mental' and 'sorted'. The >earthquake decimated the area causing in excess of £17.55 worth of >damage. >Several priceless collections of mementos from Ibiza and Corfu were >damaged beyond repair. Three preserved areas of historic importance >where burned out cars were destroyed were wrecked. Many locals were woken >before their giro's arrived. >One resident Kylie Brittony Smith, a 15 year old mother of four said >"It was such a f*ckin shock, Little Chardonnay Destiny came running into my > bedroom crying, my hands were shaking that much I could hardly skin-up. > The British Red Cross has so far managed to send 400 crates of Sunny >Delight to the area to help with the crisis. Rescue workers are still >searching through the rubble and have found numerous 'Elizabeth Duke' > sovereign rings, benefit books and poundstretcher ornaments. > HOW CAN YOU HELP? > This appeal hopes to raise money for food and clothing parcels for >those unfortunate enough to be caught up in the disaster. Clothing is most > sought after. Urgently needed are LaCoste tracksuits, white socks, > Burberry caps, Beanie hats and Reebok trainers. Food parcels are also > needed. They include McCann oven chips, Aldi beans, Monster Munch and > Iceland pizza. Alcohol is also in short supply, especially White > Lightening cider and Special Brew. >Cash donations are also needed, 22p buys a 'signing on' Biro, £2.50 >buys a Jumbo Sausage Dinner, £20.00 buys a fake MOT and £16.00 buys 200 >Regal
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