topher51

found out theres free parking on the south bank sat and sun on first come basis , all u need is here ('http://www.motorsportvision.co.uk/a1gpparking');

like that one , heres one a convict breaks into a house and ties up the husband and wife , he jumps on the wife and kisses her ear , then runs to the bathroom . The husband whispers to his wife "satisfy him" or he'll kill us both, i saw the way he kissed u , just be strong , I LOVE YOU . The wife replies , he didn't kiss me , he whispered in my ear he's gay, horny and looking for some vaseline , i told him it's in the bathroom. I LOVE YOU, but lets see who's f****** strong now !!!!!!!

just noticed something quite scary , the silouette pic under my name , actually resembles me, is it just me or does everyone think silouettes look like themselves , thats why u all changed yours !!!!!!!!!!!

Women Drivers Award 10th Place Goes to: 9th Place Goes To: 8th Place Goes To: 7th Place Goes To: 6th Place Goes To: 5th Place Goes To: 4th Place Goes To: The Bronze Medal Winner: The Silver Medal Winner: Her helmet is being worn backwards ..... and finally, here is our 2006 Women Drivers Awards *** Gold Medal Winner *** WOW ! ! How the heck...?!? Oh never mind... CONGRATULATIONS ! ! This concludes the 2006 Women Drivers Awards Ceremony. Thank you to all contestants for giving us all a reason to laugh & smile

Men vs. Women: NICKNAMES If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose. If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy. EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Bob and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want. BATHROOMS A man has six items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items. ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. CATS Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats. FUTURE A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. SUCCESS A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does. DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. NATURAL Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night. OFFSPRING Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house. THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing. --

wow, first time i've seen a pic of my car not taken by me.....lol...looks better for some reason , perhaps its a less shaky hand taking the pic , Cheers Chris

already got me tickets , sat and sun , take the scoob sat when less traffic , and weather permitting bike on sunday.lol

have read that u don't have to be mad to be here , but it helps !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! , thats why i signed up lol

Hello Baz , Chris here (scooby newbie, stupid name i know but what can u do , if ur parents call u Chris ur stuck with it) lol

looks like i will be able to make it to the wharf , but not gonna have time to meet beforehand , might have a fellow scoob in tow if thats ok !!! hopefully see everyone there !!! Chris

Matt, will see what i can do , but don't hang about waiting for me lol if i'm not there by 7 prob won't be coming !!!!

A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle. For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features. However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An older couple go to the Doctor. He asks the husband if sex is still good, and if he has any questions. 'In fact, I do,' said the old man. 'After having sex with my wife I'm usually hot and sweaty, and then, after I have sex with her the second time, I am usually cold and chilly?' Surprised he can still do it twice, the Doc then sees the wife. After examining the elderly wife, the doctor said, 'Everything appears to be fine'. Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me? The lady replied that she had no questions or concerns. The doctor then said to her: "Your husband has an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually hot and sweaty after having sex with you the first time, and then cold and chilly after the second time. Do you know why?. 'Crazy old fart,' she replied. "That's because the first time is usually in July and the second time is in December"

Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the redhead sees her boyfriend buying her flowers. The Redhead sighs and says: "Oh crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again." The blonde looks quizzically at her and says: "You don't like getting flowers from your boyfriend?" The redhead replies: "I love getting flowers, but he always has expectations after giving me flowers, and I just don't feel like spending the next three days on my back with my legs in the air." - - The blonde says: ........ "Don't you have a vase?"

hi Matt ,dunno yet about the meet , what time and where u meeting before u go to the meet ? lol

With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man that wrote "The Hokey Cokey" died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started.

A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." "You must be in IT," said the balloonist. "I am," replied the woman, "How did you know?" "Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip." The woman below responded, "You must be in Management." "I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?" "Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my f**king fault."

A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the drunk,"Are you ready to find Jesus?" The drunk answers, "Yes, oi am." So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother have you found Jesus?" The drunk replies, "No, oi haven't found Jesus." The preacher shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again for a >little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, you found Jesus my brother?" The drunk again answers, "No,oi I haven't found Jesus." By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk in the water again --- but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds and when he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up. The preacher again asks the drunk, "For the love of God have you found Jesus?" > > > > > > > > > > > >The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the Preacher, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > " Are you sure this is where he fell in?"

at least i now know its not just me that does'nt get waves returned , was really starting to feel like a loon...lol

have to admit was a little shocked when i first got waved at , but being a bit of a biker too , didn't take long to start waving at all scoobs lol

How to make a woman happy It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be: 1. a friend 2. a companion3. a lover 4. a brother 5. a father 6. a master 7. a chef 8. an electrician9. a carpenter 10. a plumber 11. a mechanic 12. a decorator 13. a stylist14. a sexologist 15. a gynaecologist16. a psychologist 17. a pest exterminator 18. a psychiatrist 19. a healer 20. a good listener 21. an organizer 22. a good father 23. very clean 24. sympathetic 25. athletic 26. warm 27. attentive 28. gallant 29. intelligent 30. funny 31. creative 32. tender 33. strong 34. understanding 35. tolerant 36. prudent 37. ambitious 38. capable 39. courageous 40. determined 41. true 42. dependable 43. passionate 44. compassionate WITHOUT FORGETTING TO: 45. give her compliments regularly 46. love shopping 47. be honest 48. be very rich 49. not stress her out 50. not look at other girls AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO: 51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself 52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself 53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes IT IS VERY IMPORTANT: 54. Never to forget: * birthdays * anniversaries * arrangements she makes HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY 1. Show up naked 2. Bring food

sorry ladies , am just forwarding this one , didn't find it funny at all !!!!! hahahahahaha WOMEN'S ENGLISH 1. Yes = No 2. No = Yes 3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry 6. We need to talk = you're in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = you better not 8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron! 10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about? MEN'S ENGLISH 1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy 3. I am tired = I am tired 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! 5. I love you = let's have sex now 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you 11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay

Job Interview 'Killer Question' >> You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night. >> >> You pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for the >> bus: >> >> 1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die. >> 2. An old friend who once saved your life. >> 3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about. >> >> Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there >> could only be one passenger in your car. Think before you continue >> reading. >> >> This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part >> of a job application. >> >> You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and >> thus you should save her first; or you could take the old friend >> because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance >> to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect >> dream lover again. >> >> The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble >> coming up with an answer WHAT DID HE SAY? >> >> He simply answered: "I would give the car keys to my old friend,and >> let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait >> for the bus with the woman of my dreams." >> >> Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn >> thought limitations. Never forget to "Think Outside of the Box." >> >> However, the correct answer is to run the old lady over and put her >> out of her misery, shag the perfect partner against the bus stop and >> drive off with the old friend for some beer. >>

must be the loony wave then as wife not with me anymore , and i'm sure the kids won't mind their dad acting the loon..pmsl

Little Bruce and Jenny are only 10 years old, but they just know that they are in love. One day they decide that they want to get married, so Bruce goes to Jenny's father to ask him for her hand. Bruce bravely walks up to him and says, "Mr. Smith, me and Jenny are in love and I want to ask you for her hand in marriage." Thinking that this was just the cutest thing, Mr. Smith replies, "Well Bruce, you are only 10. Where will you two live?" Without even taking a moment to think about it, Bruce replies, "In Jenny's room. It's bigger than mine and we can both fit there nicely." Still thinking this is just adorable, Mr. Smith says with a huge grin, "Okay then how will you live? You're not old enough to get a job. You'll need to support Jenny." Again, Bruce instantly replies, "Our allowance. Jenny makes 5 bucks a week and I make 10 bucks a week. That's about 60 bucks a month and that should do us just fine." By this time, Mr. Smith is a little shocked that Bruce has put so much thought into this. He thinks for a moment trying to come up with something that Bruce won't have an answer to. After a second, Mr. Smith says, "Well Bruce, it seems like you have got everything all figured out. I just have one more question for you. What will you do if the two of you should have little ones of your own?" Bruce just shrugs his shoulders and says "Well, we've been lucky so far." Mr. Smith no longer thinks the little shit is adorable.