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O/T - The Hen


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Posted

Collin came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk,

as  he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already

asleep.

He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.

When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed

wearing a long flowing white robe.

"Who the hell are you?" Demanded Colin, "and what are you doing in my

bedroom?".

The mysterious Man answered, "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St

Peter".

Colin was stunned "You mean I'm dead!!! That can't be, I have so much

to  live for, I haven't said good-bye to my family....you've got to send

me  back straight away".

St Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We

can only send you back as a dog or a hen."

Colin was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his

house,  he asked to be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was

covered  in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground.

"This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling

welling  up inside him.

The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, "So you're the new hen,

how  are you enjoying your first day here?"

"It's not so bad" replies Colin, "but I have this strange feeling

inside  like I'm about to explode".

"You're ovulating." explained the rooster, "Don't tell me you've never

laid an egg before".

"Never" replies Colin "Well just relax and let it happen".

And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops

out  from under his tail.  An immense feeling of relief swept over him

and his  emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for

the first  time. When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness

was  overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the

best  thing that ever happened to him...ever!!!

The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his third egg he

felt  an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife

shouting:

"Colin, wake up you drunken bas*ard, you're sh*tting in the bed!"

 

[;)][:P][:D]

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